Your child asks you to stay home from school, what do you say?
Most parents say no automatically. School attendance feels non-negotiable. Part of that anxiety driven chain where every decision compounds: right daycare → right school → right college → right life.
But what if we're optimizing for the wrong thing?
Think about the last time your kid stayed home sick. What did they actually do? Woke up, watched TV, scrolled on the iPad, ate snacks, maybe a quick art project before back to the screen.
The days home aren't productive.
What if they could be better than school?
That's what the Wright Brothers' parents figured out.
Learning at Home
When the boys were deep in a project, building a porch, building a printing press, researching French history, their parents would let them skip school to keep working. Not occasionally as a treat, but as a regular practice when learning was happening.
Milton Wright, the Wright Brothers’ father, was quoted as saying:
“Every mind should be true to itself. Should think, investigate and conclude for itself.”
The parents knew that the best way to have your kids learn is to let them explore their interests.
They valued learning over credentials.
Parents don’t need to obsess about grades. We need to spend more time helping our kids explore their interests and learn.
Learning is about experimenting and questioning assumptions. It’s not about memorizing things so you can succeed at a test.
The Wright parents understood this. They wanted their kids to enjoy learning to solve hard problems, not focus on learning facts.
Environment
The best thing we can do for the kids is to create an environment where when they’re home, they can learn more. I’m not saying people have to home school their kids. I’m saying that learning shouldn’t only happen at school.
Kids should be excited to test things out when they’re at home. Home shouldn’t become about lounging around and putting their feet up.
That starts with the parents setting the example of how to work and be curious.
The Wright parents would do this in a few different ways.
Books As Teachers
They would have books around everywhere. The had a study with many books where the father Milton could constantly be found.
He didn’t lecture his kids about the importance of reading. He just read. Constantly.
And his kids, being normal kids who wanted to be around their dad, started picking up books too. If there was a topic they were interested in learning more about, he would take them to the library to get books.
Modeling Curiosity
Another way to set the environment was Milton Wright would model curiosity for his kids. He traveled often for work and would write letters to his kids. In his letter he would describe in detail everything he saw and would model. His letters would say:
“So steep were the grades over the mountains west of Missoula that 3 locomotives were required. 2 in front, 1 behind.”
He wasn’t only telling his kids where he was and what he ate for dinner. He was telling them to observe everything around them.
Mess As Progress
Like normal kids, the Wright Brothers would play with their toys and leave them all over the house. Parents today, what do we say to our kids when they don’t clean up after themselves?
The first time we say a quick reminder. The next time, we get a little madder, by the 3-4 time we’re threatening no dessert if they don’t clean-up after themselves.
Susan did the opposite. She loved that they explored their curiosity and was happy to clean-up after them. She would put their toys away and leave projects out for them to work on the next day.
She wasn’t worried about a mess, because she knew the kids were experimenting. That’s what the Wright parents wanted to cultivate, an environment where they kids could experiment.
The Real Advantage
The payoff of this environment didn't emerge for decades. But when it did, Orville understood exactly what had made the difference
After the Wright Brothers became famous, a friend told Orville that he and Wilbur stood as examples of how far Americans with no special advantages could advance.
Orville’s response is everything:
“But it isn’t true to say we had no special advantages. The greatest thing in our favor was growing up in a family where there was always much encouragement to intellectual curiosity.”
The Wright parents didn't accidentally create geniuses. They built an environment where curiosity could flourish.
This week, try this: Next time your kid is deep in something (building, reading, experimenting), let them keep going instead of interrupting for the next scheduled activity. See what happens when exploration wins over the calendar.